this whole marriage thing

I’ve been watching this week’s marriage drama unfold on my facebook feed. It has been deeply disturbing to me as people I love on both sides take hard definitive stances – some advocating love, some hate, some religion. So much division.

If America truly were a ‘Christian nation’, as so many would like to think it is, would the American dream not be reflective of the gospel instead of self-indulgence? Would the church not love others deeply (especially through our differences as Jesus modeled for us) and act out of that love instead of building yet another building? What about the separation of church and state? Our faith doesn’t get to make the laws. If it did (as many seem to believe it should), wouldn’t there be a laws against divorce since the Bible so clearly says ‘God hates divorce?’ (Malachi 2:16). Shouldn’t we be focused on fixing the marriages in the church? Isn’t there something in the Bible about about removing the plank out of our own eye (Matt. 7:3-5)?

The deeper I’ve dug, the more I’ve read (Torn, Love is an Orientation and Washed and Waiting), the more unsure I’ve become on what the Bible actually says and I’m learning to live in the uncertainty. It is not as cut and dry as people would like to believe – there are a myriad of complexities. Different translations. Debates on what some very important words actually mean. Cultural background, both current and past. Bibliscism says that the Bible only says one thing and that is definitive but I feel that the idea that you can know what is truly ‘Biblical’ is not wholly possible (and I’m not the only one that thinks this) – we will all get something wrong even with the best intentions in place. Being wrong is an inescapable part of the human experience. God is big and he is bigger than our understanding.

I do know that I love my gay friends and that is where I am going to live. And to those dear friends, I am sorry for the hatred that you feel from the conservative religious community. It is wrong. I love you. Jesus loves you exactly as you are and He will love you no matter what the supreme court rules.

“Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for he who loves his fellow man has fulfilled the law. The commandments, ‘Do not commit adultery,’ ‘Do not murder,’ ‘Do not steal,’ ‘Do not covet,’ and whatever other commandments there may be are summed up in one rule: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ Love does no harm to its neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law.” Romans 13:8-10

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6 Comments this whole marriage thing

  1. Amanda March 28, 2013 at 2:29 pm

    And I love you so much for this post.

  2. Emily March 28, 2013 at 9:24 pm

    Love this!!!

  3. Charlotte March 29, 2013 at 2:03 pm

    I am with Emily and Amanda. Another thing to think about is that the Bible is a casebook with many case histories of failed and broken marriages, failed and broken lives, interspersed with inspiring stories of lives redeemed through the gospel of Jesus Christ and His saving grace. God bless you, Liz, for your affirmation.

  4. Jenny Smith April 1, 2013 at 1:45 pm

    I’m with you. It is a very hard discussion right now. No matter what, and in all areas of my life, I try to remember that Jesus always acted out of love. Not out of personal agenda, or fear of the unknown, but out of love. I don’t know what I think the Bible says on this issue, but I do know that for all people and at all times, I am called to act out of love toward them. So right now I just stick with that, until I’m wiser or God calls me home.

  5. Zoe April 28, 2013 at 11:02 pm

    Gay marriage just became legalized where I live (New Zealand). I think it’s great, but then I’m not religious. Personally I think that everyone is entitled to their own opinions but no one is entitled to force their opinions on others in such a harsh manner.

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